NORMAL

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How many times have you said in the past few months, I can’t wait until we get back to normal? I hear that phrase uttered every day as an attempt to explain our frustration with the thought of losing something we had. I get it. I want things to return to normal as much as anybody. Well, that’s not entirely true, I only want things to return that I liked. Things that I enjoyed, not hard or inconvenient stuff. Moreover, I want things to stay the way they are in quarantine.  Well, only the parts that include comfort and time with the family. Ultimately, we want to walk through life like we are in line at a Chipotle. We are quietly saying the words, I will have a little of that, some of those, medium spice, no tortilla, and a bag of chips to go, please.

Here’s the hard truth, change is good. Even when it’s painful it is good. Difficult times highlight the need for transformation in a way that is almost alarming. 2020 has proven to be a historic year filled with gut-wrenching and much needed but painful self-examination. The reality is that most of us thought we were in control six months ago. It’s like buying a home in Orange County in 1965 for $50,000 and having it appraised for $1,000,000 forty-five years later and calling yourself a genius. If you were a genius, you would have bought two. Most of us have been blessed to make some good decisions that have made us look way smarter than we actually are. We simply happened to be in the right place at the right time. 

As your Chief Encouragement Officer, it is my sacred duty to proclaim that you are at the right place at the right time today! Today may look more daunting than you would have imagined but it’s the perfect time for you to be alive. Forty-five years from today your older self will look back and say wow what an incredible change agent 2020 really was. We needed 2020 to shake off the scales of unwarranted pride and course correct our passionate pursuit of normal.

Think about it, as a nation we are dealing with the effects of a global pandemic, 30 million people out of work, the stock market behaving like a cork in the ocean, no school, no sports, Olympics canceled and we have seen racial injustice put correctly right to the front of the line in conversation. We are being forced to deal with 100 years of challenges in a six-month time frame. It reminds me of a semester summer school class that is crammed into the month of July. What does all this opportunity for change mean? 

It means that we are not returning to normal. I for one, say good! Normal has never produced anything of value. It feels like life just offered us a mulligan. You may have hit your golf ball out of bounds for the past 30 years but 2020 is standing there with a new ball in hand and offering you the opportunity to tee it up again. So here we are given a fresh scorecard with a new outlook for the future. Let’s bond together and make sure we don’t return to normal. Change is needed, change was needed, and as soon as we feel like we have got it down again be prepared for more change. 

Onward,

Matt Davenport

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I’VE LOST IT!

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Nearly 80 days ago, our whole world turned upside down. Stay at home orders, fear of the unknown and so much more consumed the thoughts and minds of everyday people like myself. Part of holding things together is repetition and routine. These humdrum activities don’t get enough credit for us staying grounded by practicing the predictable. Prior to these unusual times, I would come home from work and drop my wallet, keys, and sunglasses in a bowl near the front door. This simple yet predictable act would limit the opportunity for me to unjustly blame my kids for moving my stuff the next morning. Prior to the bowl at the front door, I wore a chain connecting my wallet to my pants. Not only did I think it looked cool, but it also fixed the issue of losing my wallet. Now what? No chain, no regular trips, times, schedules going to or returning from anywhere?

Roughly 60 days ago, I told the family that I can’t find my wallet and to keep an eye out for it. No big deal, it will turn up and there is not much use for it right now anyway. My focus was really on leading my business, protecting my family, and being a good community member. However, as time marched on the find my stuff app was growing louder in the back of my head. Confident it would turn up, we looked through the office, the house, the garage, and bizarre locations that sort of made sense. Sometimes it feels like you spend half the day losing things and the last half looking for them. Six weeks with no wallet, my wife suggested we cancel credit cards, renew licenses, and mourn the loss of my poke rewards card. I had moved on; new credit cards were rolling in and a fresh wallet courtesy of Jeff Bezos was on its way. 

There I am in the home office, participating in my umpteenth zoom call and my wife walks in with a small plastic storage container filled with paper napkins. Puzzled, I watched her casually pull my wallet out of this random Tupperware. Unbelievable! The unit containing my wallet was on the top shelf in our pantry. How did it get there? We have no idea and we simply didn’t care. Instead of going down the dreary path of asking how and why we found ourselves simply celebrating the fact that it was there. 

We are in a time and space that simply doesn’t make sense. We all have watched this past week as a horrible crime was committed that precipitated massive unrest in many of the major cities across our country. This is a time where many of us are saying, we have lost it! Our nation, our families, our jobs, and our community will never come back from this! I’m here to tell you that we haven’t lost anything, we have simply misplaced our hope. The virus, the violence, the economy, international unrest, and everything else we can add to this list have created an environment that is both unnerving and impossible to predict. However, unlike our sacred routines, the world has never been predictable. 

As your Chief Encouragement Officer, I want to urge you to look back. Your own personal tragedy and triumph are a great indicator of the future. It may not have been pretty, but you are here.  Don’t dwell in the why but rejoice in the opportunity to promote goodness, kindness, and mercy. Your rocky path has made you tough and has given you the confidence and endurance to press towards the mark. Celebrate the fact that life has thrown punches but like Rocky, you continue to get off the mat. 

During this time of uncertainty and chaos, our hope must be in that which will endure. We need you to embrace the past all while remaining excited for the future. Alexander Pope penned the famous line, “hope springs eternal.” Without hope, we will lose it. With hope, we can strategize, empathize, and mobilize towards a future that will be greater than the past.

Press On,

Matt Davenport

CEO

I'VE LOST IT
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Your Opinion Doesn’t Matter

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Why do we value our own opinion so much? I believe it comes from years of being hurt and discouraged to the point that the only person we trust is ourselves. 

The further we move through this pandemic the more I realize how emotionally underdeveloped I really am. I’m blessed to own a business, be happily married, have 5 kids, 2 dogs, a rabbit, a cat, and an aging gecko named Bob. If that seems like a lot going on, your opinion on this matter would be correct. My sophomoric self tends to show up most when something along the above-stated list doesn’t run like a perfectly synced marching band. Sometimes it feels like the margin for error is so thin that if the cat catches a cough the whole thing may fall apart. However, that is just my opinion.  

Why am I telling you all this? Simply to say that I have been and remain to be uniquely unqualified for any good thing that has happened in my life. I remember pulling out of the hospital with our first child 15 years ago and driving extremely slow over the speed bumps. I did this because it felt like her head may roll off. How in the world can we raise a strong woman if I can’t even get out of the parking lot? Well, that little girl is now an amazing person! At the time my opinion was leading me down a path of failure and worry. Prayer, practice, and wisdom from older parents helped us look past our own opinions and onto the exciting journey that was ahead. 

Your opinion of yourself is most likely the biggest lie you have ever chosen to believe. We have a bad habit of disqualifying our self before the person doing the qualifying has even met us. STOP IT! Your opinion is not the final judgment on who you are or what you will become. So how do we break this habit and become people that are able to push through the miry clay of self-worth? 

First, acknowledge that your opinion is not truth. You may believe that it is but understand that you have been conditioned to think much less of yourself than others think of you. Second, seek good counsel from people who have been encouraging to you. Those people tend to see you more rightly than you do. Third, consider all the good things you have in your life and be grateful. Like my dad always says, I have never met an unhappy grateful person. Finally, go for it. This life is not a trial run. This is our only shot to positively affect those with whom we have been blessed enough to know. 

In conclusion, difficult times reveal insecurities and opportunities for improvement. Today is the day for you to rid yourself of the opinions that have tethered you to unbelief. Cut the rope, break the chain, lift the anchor, and let’s collectively come out of this better than we entered. 

You have purpose,

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

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You Can’t Grow in Sweatpants

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Most of us are working diligently in pursuit of someday not working at all. Ever since Social Security was introduced by FDR, we define the American dream as not having to do anything for anybody. We wrap up this sentiment in one word – retirement.  This dream is not inspiring, it simply sounds like relief. Human beings always seek comfort. When shopping for a new mattress, furniture, or sweatpants, we process the level of comfort the item is providing. We process and prioritize the question, is this more comfortable than that? 

C. S. Lewis wrote, if you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair. As your Chief Encouragement Officer, I’m working overtime to try and keep this letter light and fluffy. The hard part about encouraging someone is that it often involves saying hard things at the right times. That being said, this week we need to exchange light and fluffy for grit and perseverance. Let’s collectively admit that we have all been bamboozled into thinking that comfort is the destination we all want and deserve. 

If you look back at your life you will find that your personal growth has always come from discomfort. So why do we so passionately pursue ease and relaxation? In effect, we dedicate our lives for the opportunity to not be challenged, tested, or held accountable. Makes sense, growth hurts and we can’t measure our growth while we are growing. Only after the growth can we look back and appreciate how we are now better off than we were prior to the discomfort. 

So, here is my encouragement, you are growing! You are improving! You are going to be better than you were prior to the pandemic! How do I know you are growing? I know you are growing because I know you’re uncomfortable. Let’s cheer each other on this week by embracing the discomfort. 

Have a great week, 

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

You Can't Grow in Sweatpants
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Free Advice

People love giving free advice. Pre-Corona, my wife and I would walk through stores with our kids and strangers would approach us with unwarranted tips and tricks. I could spot them from aisles away and knew they were headed our direction. I always laughed to myself and ask the question in my head, “What prompted that lady to go out of her way to provide insight on how she navigated the ups and downs of parenting in the ’70s.” Yet, here I am on the verge of walking up to you all and giving you advice that was not requested. 

One of the benefits of the virtual format is that you can’t really object or walk away. In fact, if you are still reading, this free advice is probably for you. So here it is…Walk don’t Run. Lifeguards have made careers out of sharing this advice with youngsters destined to slip on wet pool decks. Our youngest daughter is learning to walk. She has been crawling for several months and just recently has mustered the courage to let go of the furniture. She started with one step and now you can see here deliberating the fact that crawling is safe, but walking is going to take me places crawling can’t. 

Nobody has ever asked, “When did your kids start running?” They always want to know when they walked. Running is simple when you know how to walk. Too often, we run through life and put terms like goals, objectives, and achievements in place of the word occupied. Due to the pandemic, many of us have been required to slow our pace and take inventory of what is important. We are collectively hearing the lifeguard yell at us, WALK. 

Walking through life gives you the opportunity to enjoy the view, smell the roses, and meet fellow walkers along the way. This week, I encourage you all to walk. We can’t run past this virus and we certainly can’t pretend it hasn’t been difficult. What we can control is the speed at which we walk through this together. Most of the free advice givers typically end their council with, “Enjoy this time it goes fast.” Usually, I would give a patronizing thank you to these closing thoughts but this time I say thank you. You are right, it does go fast, and I am committed to enjoying every step.

Have a great week, 

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

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Failure is Fertilizer

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What is failure? The more I think about failure the more I’m unsure of what it is. Failure in and of itself seems like it warrants a simple definition. I picture Alex Trebek calling out the category Loser.  But the deeper I dive into great men and women throughout history it becomes clear that the failures are what made them great not the successes. Abraham Lincoln lost eight elections, failed twice in business, and managed to mix in a nervous breakdown before we crowned him one of our greatest presidents.  Is it possible that failures are the organic matter we need to prep the soil for greatness?

If that is true, then why do we fight it? To me, failure comes to those that try. If you don’t try, then you don’t fail. Wouldn’t that mean that the more you fail the more you have tried? Don’t we applaud people that stretch the boundaries of their lives? Ok, now I’m totally confused. It feels like I should be telling my kids to grow up and be failures. That can’t be right. 

Maybe failure is like fertilizer. It’s not the fruit your hoping for but it’s the necessary ingredients one needs to grow the fruit. Not just any fruit, tasty fruit. The kind of fruit that people right books about. In this way, failure should be seen as a badge of honor. A mark on your sleeve that says I’m going for it. Failure is liberating. To attempt and fail is setting the groundwork for a plentiful harvest down the road. 

As I look back on my 42 years on the planet, I’m more grateful for the failures I have had then the successes. The reality is the perceived failures were destinations that I thought were the highest calling for my life. Little did I know that these failures fertilized the soil for a journey that has been far greater than the one I was pursuing. 

This week I challenge everyone to share their story. Remember, there is always someone out there who is dealing with the fact that they just blew the biggest opportunity of their life. Pick up a shovel and help them understand the value of the good fertilizer. The future is going to be bountiful, but we need everyone’s failures to help us grow it!

Your story is important!

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

Failure is Fertilizer
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Seal Team Costco – MCFTM

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Recently, my wife and I made a trip to Costco to grocery shop in hopes of not returning to the store for several weeks. The challenge is that we have 9 people living in our house right now. My wife, 5 kids and the in-laws make shopping in bulk a necessity. Going to Costco at this juncture of the virus feels like a seal team six operation. We plan for days, wear masks, gloves and try to pick a time that we believe is most opportune to attack the oversized palettes lining the walls. Prior to the outbreak, Costco trips were delightful. We would peruse the aisles to get what we needed but often ended up leaving with what we wanted. Brilliant placement and poor self-discipline would lead to us throwing palettes of fancy organic fill in the blanks on the regular.

But the recent trips to Costco have been different. My wife and I huddled in our 12- passenger van prior to deployment. Like Patton directing his troops, I stated prior to engagement, we are here to buy not to shop. As we broke the huddle, fully suited up we entered the retail pantheon. She grabbed her cart and I grabbed mine. We split the list and gave each other a look of determination and love all mixed into one.

There I was, alone with my cart and my list. The list in hand included itemized essentials. Meat, adult beverages, chips, salsa, cheese and sides for our dinners. Halfway through my mission I began to scan other members’ carts as well as my own. It dawned on me that the items in the carts were mostly luxury items not essentials. I like to think of myself as being tough and self-disciplined. However, in the midst of a worldwide pandemic my Costco cart is telling a different story.

As I approach the frozen food section it’s all coming into focus. This hardship is stripping away the convenience and luxury that I have come to demand. Wow! As I see my wife merging into the checkout lane behind me it’s now crystal clear. Everything I have ever needed is already in my cart. I have an amazing wife, a fantastic family, an awesome career and friends with whom I would go to battle.

What’s in your cart? Is it possible that we have become so self-indulgent that we are focusing on what is lost and losing sight of what we have? This week, I encourage you all to take inventory of the tremendous blessings in your cart. The what if’s and unknown nature of this epidemic is shaking the impatience, needy and presumptuous attitude right out of us. But if you take a good look at what is in your cart you will find items that cannot be shaken. Family, love, hard work and truth.

No doubt this week will have its ups and downs. Be sure to reach into your cart and be thankful that you have been given all the essentials you will need for your journey.

You were made for such a time as this,

Matt Davenport
C.E.O.

Seal Team Costco - Monarch
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MCFTM – MINE!

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If you have ever been around children, you have heard them shout Mine! My wife and I have 5 kids and we have heard our fair share of these proclamations. Namely, around food, remote controls or iPads. What is that? At a young age, we put on display the sheer force of who we truly are. We panic when we think something is going wrong or is being taken from us so we proclaim, “Mine!” As you age, you learn that you can’t shout like this anymore, so you develop techniques that exude the same emotion without looking so immature. We cut people off on the freeway, we work the system to get to a place we think we deserve. Can’t you just hear it in your head, “Mine!” Ultimately, this “mine” mindset takes us to a place of loneliness and despair. 

Optimism and being in denial sit on a razor’s edge opposite each other. I don’t want to build a sandcastle of encouragement so it’s important that we be honest with one another. We are innately selfish and that leads to all sorts of bad life choices. I know your reading this and saying well…this is not encouraging. But in order to be encouraged you need to be honest and hit rock bottom. Rock bottom is a great foundation to rebuild and rediscover who you really are and who you are yet to become!

The opposite of the “mine” mentality is generosity. Mike Tyson once said, “everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.” This pandemic has been a punch in the face, and I have a plan to get our mind out of the boxing ring and back on track. I call this process the path to generosity. First off, we must be thankful for what we have. If you can’t think of something to be thankful for, start with the fact you can read this letter. Second, being thankful allows you to forgive others that may have intentionally or unintentionally hurt you. One of the amazing things about forgiveness is it leads to freedom. We often don’t realize that when we forgive, we are setting a prisoner free and more often than not that prisoner is us! Now that we have freedom, we rediscover joy. Joy is not a temperamental emotion; it is a state of mind that changes everything. Joy allows you to see others differently. You move from “mine” to ours. We have landed at our final destination of Generosity. 

Generosity is the vaccine for our selfish nature. The trick is that the only lab producing this vaccine is you. As your Chief Encouragement Officer, I implore you to walk the path to Generosity. There are 5 stations on this path and some of them may require longer stops than others. There is no timeline for this journey. Simply keep walking. Enjoy the walk and understand that you are perfectly and wonderfully made for this moment.

Go for it,
Matt Davenport
C.E.O.

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Adulting is Hard – MCFTM

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I have been thinking a lot lately. Truth be told we all have been thinking a lot lately. When is the last time someone told you to do your best? Come on… think about it. If you’re like most it was somewhere around 8th grade when those encouraging but challenging words stopped. Those words were sincere and forced us to be introspective and examine whether our best was good enough in the first place. Why did we stop hearing that? Did adults get together years ago and decide your best would simply not cut it anymore once you’re old enough to get your permit? In high school, doing your best turned into doing better than others. College ratchets the sentiment up even more until finally you enter the workforce. Adulting is hard but nobody ever informed us it would require more than our best. Well, that’s all about to change!

Imagine sitting in your annual review and your boss says, did you do your best? What a strange but motivating meeting that would be. The truth is we don’t always give it our best but that does not reflect on us being worthless. You and I were made just right for exactly the task at hand. Sometimes our effort needs to catch up with our gifting but I’m here to say your best is good enough. You are good enough.

So, get after the week knowing you were perfectly prepared to take on the challenges of today! 

Do your best!
Matt Davenport
C.E.O.

Adulting is Hard
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MCFTM – What Has Bill Murray Taught Us?

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In life, you have decisions to make. Most of these decisions revolve around how you will respond to what life brings your way. I like the idea of responding rather than reacting. As the old adage goes when life gives you lemons make lemonade. 

Today, we are dealing with Lemons aka COVID-19.  How will you respond? How will we respond? Like most 40 somethings I have chosen to turn to Bill Murray for guidance. The great American actor made two films that seem to have been cut in order to guide us through these sour days of uncertainty. 

The first lighthouse is Groundhog Day. Bill Murray plays Phil Connors, a tv weatherman who in his own arrogance believes he is beyond the task of showing up in Punxsutawney, Pa. to watch a groundhog do his job. Phil finds himself in a time loop which includes doing the same thing day after day. Sound familiar? For the first several days, Phil maintains his level of smug by being his normal hedonistic self. However, as the movie progresses so does Phil. He decides to respond rather than react. Phil begins to see Groundhog Day as an opportunity for growth and personal development. He learns the piano, how to sculpts ice and to speak French fluently. Most importantly, Phil begins to think of himself less and think more often of other people. As a result, Phil breaks out of the time loop a better human. 

The second lighthouse Bill Murray offers us in this storm is What About Bob.  Bill Murray’s character Bob Wiley is a highly obsessive, germophobic and anxiety-driven patient who recently began getting therapy from Dr. Leo Marvin. Dr. Leo Marvin is a self-absorbed character who is seeing his star rise based on the recent success of his book Baby Steps.  Dr. Leo Marvin’s advice to Bob is to take a vacation from his problems. Bob does so by following Dr. Leo Marvin and his family to their month-long vacation on Lake Winnipesaukee. The serene setting is destroyed by Bob’s relentless and obsessive need for Dr. Leo Marvin’s help. Ultimately, Dr. Leo Marvin is rendered catatonic after seeing Bob unintentionally destroy his Good Morning America appearance and accidentally blow up his vacation home. Bob ends up a phycologist and famous author while Dr. Leo Marvin is stuck in a stupefied state. Bob was always a people person and Dr. Leo Marvin was always Leo Marvin person.

I have been accused of quoting movie lines that are outdated. But, I insist they are timeless and are an important part of our snarky generation’s legacy.  One of the side benefits of the shelter in place has been watching these classic movies alongside the 42 pack of microwave popcorn I purchased in preparation for the quarantine. My oldest daughter is a freshman in high school and tends to be the most appreciative of these weekend viewing party’s we have shared thus far. 

So why did Bill Murray come to mind when I let my mind wonder about the effects the virus may have on us long term? I’m not sure, other than the fact that he is an introvert who becomes an extrovert on film and provides some socially awkward insight into what we are all dealing with when we stare at each other from 6’ away at the grocery store.

What do we learn from all of this? 

In the midst of this difficult time, wash your hands, take this time to improve yourself as a person, think of yourself less often, and take a vacation from your problems. 

Matt Davenport, C.E.O.

What has Bill Murray Taught Us April 6th
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