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CONTROL FREAK

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We are 10 months into a year that will forever change the nation, the world and your life. The next 10 months will be different. That’s just it, every day is different. We can’t hold onto things of the past and effectively move into the future. It would be like holding onto the bumpers of 2 cars slowing pulling the opposite direction. Here is my advice, let go of both bumpers and simply give yourself the opportunity to enjoy today.

Control is at the center of most of our stress. We are stressed about the outcome of the election. What if your candidate loses? What if this happens, what if that happens? What will the economy do? What will the world look like for my kids? All of these concerns are to not be taken lightly but they are to be held loosely. If you are honest with yourself, you will admit that the greatest things that have ever happened to you were outside of your control.

We often have great things happen to us that were unplanned and totally undeserved. Instead of continuing to walk and enjoy what we received we put that blessing into a chokehold by managing the fun right out it. STOP IT. Attempting to control the outcome of every situation is exhausting and counterproductive. Not only does it not work but it makes being around you miserable. Here are a few tips for intentionally releasing control:

-Admit that you are not any good at control once you have it.

-Write down all the good events in your life that came outside of your planning

-Be quick to be generous

-Ask someone you trust to remind you when you are beginning to micromanage

-Get over yourself

In order to get over yourself entirely, you must accurately see yourself. This tall task cannot be done on an island and requires a community of good friends. As your Chief Encouragement Officer, I challenge you to take inventory of your stress and see how much of it is related to control. You may want to ask yourself this tough question if 2020 hasn’t beaten the control freak out of me, what will?

CHILL OUT,

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

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ICEBERG AHEAD

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What happens to you when you identify an obstacle in your passageway. For most people, the vulnerability light bulb on the dashboard in their head goes off which is immediately followed by an attempt to change direction. This change in direction is intended to save us from sure disaster and give us the opportunity to steer the ship back to its original course. Needless to say, we make a double effort to make these changes smooth, subtle, and hardly noticeable to those traveling with us.  

Recently, I was riding shotgun with my 15-year-old daughter as she works to accumulate enough hours to become a valid driver. We were driving down a reasonably trafficked road in a suburb near our house in Southern California. She elected to change lanes which at the time felt like we were avoiding a deer. The sudden change in direction reminded me that often in life we are required to pivot rather than turn on our blinker, check the mirrors and comfortably float to the neighboring lane.

Pivoting requires a fixed point. Think of a protractor, half of your body must be anchored and the other half agile. We create plans for all sorts of stuff: Study plans, exercise plans, college plans, retirement plans, vacation plans, financial plans, business plans, 3-year plans, 5-year plans, and finally plans to make more plans. Don’t get me wrong, plans are good. I believe planning is a way for us to place value on our daily sojourn. While plans are good, they are oftentimes impossible to execute as predetermined. A great plan should always include plenty of room for pivoting.

Pivoting almost always pushes us towards the events in life that are most memorable.

Pivoting requires three things:

Be anchored in who you are. Without an anchor, you will become part of somebody else’s plan.

Know where you are going. This is a life direction that is broad and exciting.

Be confident saying that you have no idea how you are going to get where you want to go.   Get comfortable in a world of uncertainty.

Enjoy the Sudden Changes,

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

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GOT PURPOSE?

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Life is pretty simple. It becomes more complex as we age but for the most part, we just want to be happy. Happiness is a fickle emotion that is impossible to bottle up or buy. Disneyland has apparently cornered the market as the happiest place on earth. Unfortunately, this bastion of happiness has been closed down for 6 months. This makes me wonder where the second happiest place on earth has been all these years and why are they not touting their new number 1 status?

Happiness has been and always will be ruthlessly unpredictable and undeniably disloyal. Happiness is a puzzle and it is made up of several pieces. Here are a few:

– Be difficult to offend

– Discover a place of belonging (Big Piece)

– Find fulfillment regardless of the task

– Dedicate your life to helping others

– Understand your purpose (Biggest Piece)

These are a few of the corner pieces that are crucial for assembling the happiness puzzle. Most people want to skip the first four and discover their life calling listening to a podcast. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness. The Declaration of Independence calls it a pursuit of happiness because that’s what it is – a pursuit.

As your Chief Encouragement Officer, I would urge you to survey your puzzle. What pieces are on the board but in the wrong place? What pieces are missing? At the end of the day, happiness and joy are knowing that your activity and production are what you do not who you are. Answering life’s great questions is always a pursuit.

Stay in the game because you will soon find out that you were born for such a time as this.

Have Fun,

Matt Davenport

C.E.O.

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